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- I couldn’t quite put my finger on this strange feeling that I have been having for a few weeks now. I thought it was because of the quarantine, self-isolation, and social distancing stuff, and I’m sure that’s part of it. But there was a familiarity to it. It’s like I felt this before. It’s a familiar ache, like the pain an old scar or broken bone might give when you move wrong – it’s not acute, but it is remembered and known.
And then I put my finger on it.
During my sixth pregnancy, I remember going to a midwife appointment. The nurse took my vitals and did an exam. And then she said enthusiastically while holding my 2nd trimester belly, “From here to here, that’s your baby!” And for the first time during that particular pregnancy I remember feeling truly excited with anticipation that within four more months, I would be holding my little baby.
Unfortunately, I only carried that baby for a few more weeks and then he was stillborn at 20 some weeks. And there was such a feeling of loss and emptiness.
I’m sure all of us are experiencing that now. We had plans, hopes, dreams, things we wanted to accomplish in this springtime. Things we wanted to see and do, and once-in-a-lifetime events we wanted to attend. And now that’s all gone, and the longer the reaction to this pandemic goes on, the more that is lost.
It’s probably a healthy thing to experience the different stages of grief including denial, anger, sadness, bargaining (protesting) and acceptance. I think right now I’m in a loop between sadness, bargaining, and acceptance. But now that I’ve identified when I’ve felt like this before and had my “ah-ha” moment, maybe I can just settle into acceptance.
And one more thing mom and dad … don’t let anyone shame you for feeling a sense of loss. This isn’t just the life of your kid – this was your chance to play the part of the parent. To give flowers at the dance recital, cheer at the baseball game, to take those treasured photos with your graduate. Or maybe your child’s wedding is being downsized tremendously. Maybe you remembered how your parents handled those things for you and you wanted to pay it forward to your own child! It’s heartbreaking that that can’t happen this year and none of the cyber graduations or drive by tributes can help make that better. In some ways they are just bitter reminders of what was lost. I say you gotta move through the grief of this to go forward.
Oh and I guess I have one more thing to say about that. Be kind. Everyone is trying to deal with this. Everyone’s lives have been disrupted. Be nice to one another.
2. I got to play a concert yesterday!
I got to play a concert yesterday with three singers and our music director at our church. We wore masks and observed social distancing. It was just so wonderful to play music again in that wonderful space with some of my friends! And I’m very grateful that the parish was able to live stream it and save it on Youtube.
3. My kids did their piano recital today and I recorded that too!
That will be posted later today.
4. You may have heard that in the midst of this pandemic, with record profits and lots of business, Amazon decided to cut the affiliate rates to their affiliates quite significantly. I hadn’t realized how lazy I had become in linking to them. It’s so easy to find something I want to link to or promite, get the link, and just put it up on the blog. But with this cut I wondered, if there might be an alternative at least for books.
I found it. It’s called Bookshop.org and they find books from locally-owned small bookstores! What I love, is that they let me curate my own books and have my own little bookstore on their site just like Amazon used to! Check it out!
5. People are losing their minds about face masks.
This was written by Rep. Nino Vitale:
Why the Science Says Face Masks Are Unable to Prevent Inhaling of Airborne Particles
In today’s press conference, Dr. Acton failed to give any hard-scientific reasons for the implementation of mandatory masks in Ohio. Here are 12 researched and reviewed scientific studies published between 2004 and 2016 on the inadequacies of face masks. In fact, they may cause MORE health issues.
The link to the medical summary is provided below. Here are the highlights. Share this truth.
“All (studies) agree that the poor facial fit and limited filtration characteristics of face masks make them unable to prevent the wearer from inhaling airborne particles.”
“The primary reason for mandating the wearing of face masks is to protect personnel from airborne pathogens. This review has established that face masks are incapable of providing such a level of protection.”
In 2015, Dr. Leonie Walker, “Health care workers have long relied heavily on surgical masks to provide protection against influenza and other infections. Yet there are no convincing scientific data that support the effectiveness of masks for respiratory protection.”
In their well-referenced 2011 article on respiratory protection for healthcare workers, Drs. Harriman and Brosseau conclude that, “facemasks will not protect against the inhalation of aerosols.”
“A recent 2014 report states categorically that no clinical trials have ever shown that wearing a mask prevents contamination.”
“The pathogen laden aerosols produced by everyday talking and eating would have the potential to cause significant disease.”
“If masks contained filters capable of trapping viruses, the peripheral gaps around the masks would continue to permit the inhalation of unfiltered air and aerosols.”
“Masks will always fit fairly loosely with considerable gaps… These gaps do not provide adequate protection as they permit the passage of air and aerosols when the wearer inhales.”
“Most studies on face masks have been based on laboratory simulated tests which quite simply have limited clinical applicability as they cannot account for such human factors as compliance, coughing and talking.”
“Coughing, sneezing, nasal hairs, respiratory tract cilia, mucous producing lining cells and the phagocytic activity of alveolar macrophages provide protection against inhaled foreign bodies including fungi, bacteria and viruses.”
6. My take on Facemasks.
I get that people are scared and the answers in the media can be confusing. My own governor said that masks were not mandatory after he said the day before that they were! So no wonder people are confused.
I will wear a mask if I think people will be uncomfortable if I do not wear a mask. When I played my concert yesterday, I walked in with a mask and wore it at all times except for when I was playing my flute. I was about 12 to 18 feet from the closest person.
But most of the time, when I’m going for a walk, or even dashing into the store, I don’t wear one, because they are kind of useless. A coronavirus is microscopic. You need a special microscope to see it. If you took the average cloth mask and looked at it under a high school microscope, you would be able to see the tiny spaces between the woven threads. Of course, a virus could travel through a cloth mask. And if it gets wet from respiration or perspiration, it’s even more permeable.
What particularly worries me is that people are just so sure that they are safer because they are wearing a mask, that they might be more inclined to lessen social distancing or venture into crowds because they’ve got their mask on! Our medical director keeps saying strange things like, “Don your mask and your cape!” I guarantee you, there’s someone out there that thinks they’re like a superhero because they’ve got a mask on that they whipped up on the family sewing machine.
There is no study supporting the safety of these masks. The CDC doesn’t even have one. But I did find this on the CDC web site:
- Note: Non-medical fabric masks are not considered PPE and their ability to protect HCWs is currently unknown; some studies suggest that it may lead to a false sense of protection and even increase influenza-like illness relative to wearing a medical mask (MacIntyre et al, 2015). Caution should be exercised when considering this option.
7. Living Through History
Did you get your copy of Living Through History yet, a Personal memoir of living through the coronavirus of 2020? It’s a quick writing prompt for students, and a fun way for families to remember this strange time we’re going through. It’s something I wrote for my own use and then fine-tuned it to make it something for others to use. Get your PDF here and thanks for supporting my blog.
Will you get credit no matter what I buy on the book site, or only your suggestions. We are buying our homeschooling materials for next year.