Writing a letter to your confirmation candidate

It seems that one of the biggest events in confirmation preparation in this country is the letters of support to be given to the confirmation candidates during their mandatory retreats.

I have three such letters saved on this blog:

Confirmation letter to my daughterConfirmation letter to my fourth sonConfirmation letter to to my third son
I've asked my children what they remember about the letter they got from me and their dad, and also what they remembered about the letters they received. 
The answer was not much, or at least nothing specific. In general they were happy to have gotten a bag full of letters and there was a sense of feeling loved and supported. I guess that's the main thing - for them to have a sense that this is an important step in their spiritual growth, and that people they know, love and respect have taken the time out of their lives to let them know that! So here are some tips on procuring and writing letters for young confirmation candidates. Start thinkin…

The Last Day of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month


Today is the last day of October and the final day of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. Sixteen years ago today I went into labor with my 6th baby at 23 weeks. He was born still into his father's hands in our home. 

I wrote our story in five parts:
Touched by Grace
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5

A few weeks ago I went to my doctor's office to make an appointment about my ongoing knee problems. I wanted to make sure that I could get into see him before the busy holiday season. The closest appointment they had was on November 1. 

I took the appointment card thinking, "Something is going on November 1. What am I forgetting?" 

A minute later I remembered that it was All Saints Day and that I would probably have to play for a mass that day or on the eve before. But it was on the way home that it hit me - it was also Raphael's birthday. 

I have read a lot of really raw and sad stories this month from women who have had fresh losses, or whose babies have passed within the past five years or so. I just want to let those moms know that the pain does lessen. The raw grief will disappear. A decade and a half later maybe the awful date will even escape you for a bit. 


Yet while I write that I also am aware that I'm a little more emotional this time of year. Maybe it's the change of seasons. Maybe it's the end of cross country competition for my kids. Maybe it's the daunting Christmas season ahead. But maybe it's also that I remember the little grave out in Holy Cross Cemetery that I'll need to visit sometime this week with flowers and a prayer. 

homeschool picnic, findagrave 023

To all the moms grieving this month, remember this is just a season of your life. It will pass with time. Here are 10 Things I'd Like You to Know.  See also my pregnancy loss page here. 

homeschool picnic, findagrave 024

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