Today is Sam's 21 birthday - truly a legal adult now with all of the 21-year-old super powers they don't want to give you at 18.
I wrote Sam's birth story a few years ago. As difficult as that was, I think launching him into adulthood has been harder. Probably because I see so much talent and potential in him, musically and academically and he simply doesn't seem to want to go that way with his life - content to live on his own, over a shop that he manages and works at. He has also become a Catholic/Easter Catholic - a place I entered in my 20s and a place I hoped that I could help all of my children avoid. So far I am 3 for 3 in failing on that score.
On the other hand I do see some fine qualities that I am so happy that he has - he's a hard and steady worker and a very good employee, he is loyal to his long-time girlfriend and he still makes time once in a while for the rest of his family. That's good.
But still I desperately hope that he doesn't get to 30 and wonder what he did with all of his time in his 20s?
I don't say anything. I don't text him or call much. I drop into his store once a week just to see how he is doing. That's it.
I'm constantly thinking of this quote from Simcha Fisher.
To become a mother, I had to learn how to care about someone more than I did about myself, and that was terrible. But who I am now is something more terrible: the protector who can’t always protect; the one with arms that are designed to hold, always having to let go.
Still, here is where we were 21 years ago today Hopefully and God willing, we'll be someplace equally amazing 21 years from today!