Writing a letter to your confirmation candidate

It seems that one of the biggest events in confirmation preparation in this country is the letters of support to be given to the confirmation candidates during their mandatory retreats.

I have three such letters saved on this blog:

Confirmation letter to my daughterConfirmation letter to my fourth sonConfirmation letter to to my third son
I've asked my children what they remember about the letter they got from me and their dad, and also what they remembered about the letters they received. 
The answer was not much, or at least nothing specific. In general they were happy to have gotten a bag full of letters and there was a sense of feeling loved and supported. I guess that's the main thing - for them to have a sense that this is an important step in their spiritual growth, and that people they know, love and respect have taken the time out of their lives to let them know that! So here are some tips on procuring and writing letters for young confirmation candidates. Start thinkin…

My Domestic Church Daily Clips 03/29/2010

  • tags: Catholic, Christian, Holyweek

  • tags: no_tag

    • Pay attention. Say something. Ask what you can do to help. Remember that a woman who has given birth to a dead child has given birth and is recovering physically, too. Don't be afraid of grieving parents.

      For me, one of the things that really helped was other people's actual grief, the friends who made it clear that they weren't sad for me, but sad for themselves. They were looking forward to meeting this kid. They missed him.

      In retrospect, I can see how brave those people were -- it's easy to worry about claiming one's own grief in the face of greater grief -- but it was the immediacy of the feelings that meant so much to me, that, and seeing that if other people were sad, then I had the right to be really sad.

      Above all, don't try to hurry them into feeling better or suggest that you hope they're over it.

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