18 years ago today

I became a mother for the first time 18 years ago today. I might write out my birth story later today or tomorrow when I have more time.

It was a terrible birth experience for a first time mom. I remember people saying “mother and baby are fine” and wanting to scream “I’M NOT FINE!” But I think what is meant by that was that I wasn’t dead nor was I likely to be dead any time soon aka – fine.

Calvin’s birth was a turning point for so many things in my life. It was one of the catalysts for my reversion back to my Catholic faith, it lead me to homeschooling, and for a time, it made me a voracious childbirth advocate. I even became a doula for a time and attended several births.

But mostly as I think about it today, I remember laying in my hospital bed with this tiny person and wondering how was I going to teach him to use the potty, or to walk and talk. I felt so stupid. As if I would never be able to be a good mother to him.
Then maybe it was God’s grace, but I remember suddenly feeling calm and knowing that I would just take it one day at a time. So 365 days x 18 years later, we’re here.

Calvin still has some rough edges (who didn’t at 18!) but he is a wonderful young man and I feel very blessed to be his mother.

Save This Page

Digg It

Please browse my eBay items!
Visit my new Amazon Store!