Sunday, November 07, 2004

Sex in marriage

I'm moving parts of my discussion with Bonnie up here so they don't get buried and then lost to the archives!


One of my main points in defending Natural Family Planning with Bonnie, is that it works with the natural cycle that God has put into the woman's body anyway.


Bonnie asks, "What about the natural cycle of marital sexuality that exists anyway?"


Well, what about it? After 25 years of marriage, 7 pregnancies, 5 kids, separations, illness, grief, financial difficulties, and other influences, I don't think there is a "natural cycle of marital sexuality that exists!"

When we first got married, Mr. Pete and I literally did nothing on Sundays. We slept late, made French toast, and then usually went to the beach in the summer time. After lounging around in the sun and surf all day, there was usually lots of lovemaking once we got home! That abruptly ended with my first pregnancy where sleep pre-empted desire, and my huge belly made the effort of intimacy somewhat questionable at best. Add that to years of kids that wake up puking, peeing or having nightmares and I don't think we ever got into a "sex cycle." Sometimes it was, "I've got a 30 minute video for the kids... let's go!!"

But it wasn't just raising a family that changed any cycle that might have changed any "cycle." Mr. Pete started a business. Lovemaking doesn't make the top 10 things to do after a 60 hour work week. Grief can also make sex a lower priority.

Not all changes in our lives have meant a slower love life. Older kids who can be responsible and respectful of our privacy has given us more time and opportunity for intimacy. It just depends on what's going on in our lives.

The point is, as human beings, with wills and souls, we aren't like the rest of creation. We don't have to "mate" just because we are in season. We can use our minds, and our intellects, as well as our love and affection to make these determinations. But most importantly even if we determine we can't have sexual intimacy at a certain time for whatever reason, (illness, pregnancy, NFP) we don't have to let that influence our love and care for our mates.





Please feel free to leave a comment under the posting, or sign my Spiritbook (guestbook). You can chat with me on the tag board to the right!
Pin It

0 comments: